Of glare displays and rectal colour professionals.

Yes, hardly anybody was happy about Apple releasing their current line of notebook computers with glare displays. Plus a sheet of glass in front of said displays. Gnashing of teeth ensued, and naturally the “colour professionals” had to put their heads up their collective rectums, too: Give us matte displays NOW!

All Jack Bauer-ish screaming bloody murder didn’t impress Apple all that much. Well, okay, there was an option for non-gloss in their largest MacBook model, followed by built-to-order 15” thingies with matte panels. But rectal professionals aren’t happy yet. Give us non-glare 13” MacBook Pros, or we’ll shove our heads further up our asses! Err, I mean: Or we’ll never buy an Apple product again! Ever! You can’t work with colours on them oversaturated glossy crap displays! Satan invented them, and Jesus Jobs has to fight the Powers of Oversaturation!

Dudes, get a life.

Current notebook panels aren’t meant for colour-critical work. That’s why a multi-thousand quid screen occupies your desk if you’re a colour professional. (You own one, don’t you?) With portable computers, be happy if you’re able to discern contrast, brightness, and a picture’s tonal curve. Forget about proofing your photos for CMYK printing or proper gamut or whatever funky jargon you like to spew. (Also, it impresses cute psychology students less than you might think. Work on another pickup line, nerd.)

It’s a bloody TN display, folks. As with 99.9 % of all notebook computers. We’re talking panels here that often can’t even show more than a couple of hundred thou colours at the same time without dithering. We’re talking about the lowest rank of computer screens available at this time. Panels that show colour shift if you move your head by a fraction of an inch. TN panels aren’t used to annoy “professionals”, but because they consume less power than abovementioned proofing display in your controlled-lighting office. (You do work in such an office, don’t you?) Less power draw is a good thing for portable computers.

But hey, let’s forget about the uncomfortable necessities and concentrate on the real professional issue here: The bleeder’s a glossy!

Now, I do feel for business people who have to give presentations in sunny rooms and work in crammed train coaches and the like. You know, the dudes who are happy just to see something onscreen. Glare is an issue in such environments, especially if your manufacturer thinks that a bright display will gobble up too much of the undersized battery’s precious power.

None of them business pros bitches about wonky colours, though. They bitch about working with shaving mirrors if the sun’s behind them. Sensible line of bitching. Complaining about “unprofessional colour reproduction” in a notebook is not.

Get sticky anti-glare sheeting if you care so much about reflections. It won’t make them colours worse than they already are. Or, better still: Remove your cranium from the poop shoot and concentrate on doing some actual work. You know, people used to proof on grayscale displays not too long ago. And Time Magazine et al still had pictures in ’em. In colour, too!

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