Think green. Think different. Think Apple 2011.

Cheerio Apple. You lead the industry through innovation and reduce-to-the-max. You know what people want; after all, you have sold gazillions of computers and iDevices in the past five years. You know better than your customers what said customers really want, what they need. To wit:

» Automated picture slide shows. With drop shadows!

» Indiana-Jones-themed fonts, music, and maps for movie templates.

» Fullscreen!

» Software that will make your school band’s rehearsals unnecessary. In fullscreen!

» But Apple still include interactive instrument lessons, Gods know why.

» A central repository store for applications. Unfortunately, not in fullscreen.

» Soldered Proprietary mass storage for your new notebooks. Instant-on is more important than easy repair or expansion.

» Application switcher on steroids. And in fullscreen!

» Have I mentioned fullscreen applications with integrated mail and social media functionality? After a couple of decades proclaiming it’s all about documents, not applications?

Your track record is legendary, oh mighty Apple. So I guess you really hit the bull’s eye with your estimate of what the masses really buy need. Think different? Well, if this includes think Facebook, think biotagging, think DRM, you’ve also hit the nail into the bull’s eye. Or something.

And if your mass storage fucks up, well, think green, too, and put your MacBook Air in the trash. That’s what you have your Greenpeace No Heavy Metals certificate for, after all.

4 thoughts on “Think green. Think different. Think Apple 2011.

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention Angry Sascha is angry.» Blog Archive » Think green. Think different. Think Apple 2011. --

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