Tag Archives: wtf?

Leica: So let’s be luddite and ask for a lot of money, too.

So you really did it, eh? Flick the bird to what’s up nowadays, and asking for a € 1000 premium, too? Fine by me.

So you think a rehash of a 30 years old lens design it worth a couple of thou more than what you’ve toted the best there is™, the ultimate sharpness in 50mm™? Fine by me.

Because I don’t really care.

I enjoy black-and-white photography, a lot. I also enjoy the Summicron even more; it’s reasonably fast in a small package. But dudes! What were you thinking!

I guess your thinking went along these lines:

“Well, they cough up no matter what we ask for, so, eh.”

But that’s the approach that killed Loewe, Grundig, Braun, and many other manufacturers. Their brands to be gobbled up by multinationals betting on sales due to “traditional” names.

But then, not to worry, you have not one, but two Hermès special editions at the ready! No Panasonic or Minolta will take you over, na, you‘re too cool for them sharks! You pamper your audience with calfskin leather, after all. Or Hermès is, for that matter. For people less inclined to Bling you make sure to feature the launch with a renowned BnW-only photographer. And Mr. Liefers, because Wagnerian TV pathologists are Teh Real Shit™.

(I should mention I really like what @JanJosefLiefers does, especially music- and Tatort-wise, but that’s just me.)

I might not care for your new products, but I do care about where you seem to be headed. I’m all for solutions that are out there, no worries. But, seriously, Leica – there’s a limit to bullshit even proverbial milk cows will take. And, personally, I won’t go moo just because you tell me to. Even though I love your stuff. Bugger.


Think green. Think different. Think Apple 2011.

Cheerio Apple. You lead the industry through innovation and reduce-to-the-max. You know what people want; after all, you have sold gazillions of computers and iDevices in the past five years. You know better than your customers what said customers really want, what they need. To wit:

» Automated picture slide shows. With drop shadows!

» Indiana-Jones-themed fonts, music, and maps for movie templates.

» Fullscreen!

» Software that will make your school band’s rehearsals unnecessary. In fullscreen!

» But Apple still include interactive instrument lessons, Gods know why.

» A central repository store for applications. Unfortunately, not in fullscreen.

» Soldered Proprietary mass storage for your new notebooks. Instant-on is more important than easy repair or expansion.

» Application switcher on steroids. And in fullscreen!

» Have I mentioned fullscreen applications with integrated mail and social media functionality? After a couple of decades proclaiming it’s all about documents, not applications?

Your track record is legendary, oh mighty Apple. So I guess you really hit the bull’s eye with your estimate of what the masses really buy need. Think different? Well, if this includes think Facebook, think biotagging, think DRM, you’ve also hit the nail into the bull’s eye. Or something.

And if your mass storage fucks up, well, think green, too, and put your MacBook Air in the trash. That’s what you have your Greenpeace No Heavy Metals certificate for, after all.

Don’t walk off The Path, or I’ll wet my undies.

Some games make me angry, others don’t. Tale of Tales’ The Path resides, comfortably sheltered in a motherly embrace, in the second category. “Little Red Riding Hood” provokes fond memories, not the least as the name of my defunct cover band, but I digress. In this case, you’re in for a serious ride. Molestation included. As The Path says: “There’s only one rule. Stay on the path. The only way to win this game is by breaking said rule.” Or something. I can’t remember as I’m sitting in my shirt&ascot and tremble with fear.

This game has balls, even though the protagonists are all girls of various ages. Ages as in kids-growing-up, not a history lesson. Fine by me. All of ’em have to get to grandma’s house and all of them are bleeding idiots for straying from The Path. Probably because the player, i.e. yours truly, is supposed to make them do so. After all, you’ll only see the SUCCESS! badge – in childlike scrawling – onscreen if you’ve actually found The Wolf. You know. Man. The Male Principle expressing itself through its primary sexual organ. Ironic, isn’t it? Me, of a distinct male persuasion, leading girls to their doom because that’s the only way to progress in the game? And feeling like a major shit about it, too? That’s art, I tell you.

At least, that’s my personal interpretation of The Path. A game, I should mention, that has reaped prizes galore for being a “work of art,” so I might not be that far off. Even though I find it questionable that no boy victims characters are present. I smell the reek of simplified reality.

But bloody hells is it creepy.

I mean, you have these six girls, and you lead them through the forest. If you go straight through, guiding them savely to their grandmother’s bed, you’ll get a cut scene and a bloody huge FAILED! If you explore the woods, you’ll find golden stuff that adds up to 144. But to win each level, you’ll need to encounter perverted bastards The Wolf. You have to make them girls suffer! To make you suffer and think about all those people who actually experienced similar things in real-life.

Games as a means to public awareness? Certainly a game not meant for lightheaded entertainment.

At least not regarding the topic. The game is entertaining in a weird sort of way. You know. The same reason you watch Horror movies late at night and then complain about your having nightmares. Getting scared is fun. This game scares the bejeezus out of you, just to make you feel bad about it afterwards, too. At least if you’re a wolf man.

Not for the faint of heart. Or rather, not for the faint of imagination as The Path isn’t graphic, it isn’t violent. It’s, well, creepy, thought-provoking, and bloody scary. Figures it took a woman to pull this off. It’s only about a tenner and well worth the money, but for chrissakes, if you’ve been abused, do not download even the demo!

I just hope more people will pay them Indy Developers. Because, seriously – would you rather have disturbing games about childhood rape or the next Harry Potter fly-about? If the quality of indy games is on par with The Path, I know what I’d choose. It’s about bloody time games lost their childish aura. And Tale of Tales are right in the middle of it.

Serious stuff. For adults. With brains. And a heart. What more could you want?